Why I Cannot Quit

Everyone gets to a point in their lives where they feel stuck, they get too comfortable and stop trying. They sit at a desk all day, at a job they hate surrounded by people they don't care for and for a wage that doesn't cover the bills. It's easy to say - "Walk away. Hate it? Change it. Just do it." However, the reality of the situation is that you have rent, utilities, bills, credit card debt, school loans and pets. You need gas for the car, food to eat and all those household necessities that you took for granted when you were younger (i.e toilet paper, paper towels, soap). Maybe you have a child to care for, a family to feed or are supporting your parents or siblings too. We all have our own situation we're dealing with and while I may not have answers to how or what or why, I do know this much from experience: quitting is never the answer.

If life was easy, we would all be able to fulfill our dreams and live in the life of luxury. Unfortunately, we don't live in a movie, there's not always a happy ending or climax where things all of a sudden get better. Nope, not in real life. The truth is, we either push harder and strive or we fall into a comfort zone, bitch, live in misery and die. We're all going to die - the question is, how will you be remembered? What will you be remembered for? What are you going to regret on that deathbed? Think about it, if you were diagnosed with cancer and had exactly 60 days to live, what would you do? "But Lisa, I can't quit my job and throw everything aside to go to Paris. I can't even afford a new pair of shoes!" Well guess what, me either and as depressing as that may sound, you don't have to sulk about it.

"Either you run the day, or the day runs you." This quote is by far the truest about our lives. You've heard the "live life to the fullest", "carpe diem" type of quotes before and while they're all great, I love this one the best. You may not have full control on how your day goes or what happens throughout the day but you can either let that shit ruin your mood or push through it. Just meet up with your girlfriends after work and take advantage of those happy hour specials later as a treat. 

Ready for another awesome quote? "If you don't try, how do you know you're going to fail?" Balancing life is hard. Finding time to do everything you want in one day is impossible, but with some practice, you can prioritize what is most important to you. Yeah, I would love to exercise more, go hiking and have hit up the bars/clubs with friends more but when it comes down to it - would I rather pass my quiz or risk it for a night of drinking (and spending money I can't spare)? Prioritize. Learning to do so will save you so much time and energy! You can't do it all so might as well do the things that will make you happier and allows you to be the most productive. If you can't decide, flip a coin and the answer will come before you even see if you got heads or tails.

Now let's round this back to the beginning - that job. So you can't quit, I can't either and more than half my friends are in the same situation. But, that shouldn't stop you from pursuing what you do want to do. Not too long ago I enrolled myself back into school, one year after graduating from CSULB with a BA in American Studies (don't even ask me what that is). I've held several positions within the corporate world (over a decade of work experience):

  • Customer service: didn't last long before my supervisor realized I was too bitchy on the phones and pushed me up to supervisor so I can bark at other employees instead.
  • Sales: forcing people to buy shit they don't need - it was fun for awhile.
  • Accounts receivable/payable assistant: calling people and harassing them for payments (vice versa). 
  • Supervisor: it was fun until you really have to deal with the really anal customer because you're the supervisor. Thankfully it was an e-commerce company.
  • Buyer: the best position ever. Spending money that wasn't mine. I miss it. 
  • Data entry processor: the most boring position ever and how I got carpel tunnel
  • Front desk: being forced to play nice and smile all the time when tenants are screaming in your face is a test of utter patience. I didn't survive.
  • Public relations and social media coordinator: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and blogging all day. Press releases, sponsoring events, creating sales tools, meetings with international accounts and trade shows in Vegas. It's alright.

I was also a server at a revolving sushi place for a brief period; second job for the extra money. I worked in a physical therapy office for a lazy ass doctor. That lasted a few months before I got tired of doing all the work for shit pay. I did figure out how much I love wearing scrubs and am excited to wear them more often after I become a RN! Yep, I am serious. Oh and my very first job involved roasted chestnuts, in front of Mitsuwa market place when I was 16. "Hot, fresh roasted chestnuts by the pound." Paid under the table and at the age of 16, $12 an hour was NOT bad.

So I've crappy jobs, I've been at great companies where they care and have had bosses I've wanted to strangle. My point? I have shit to pay for so I can't just quit, but I will look hard as heck for the next best thing. If it doesn't work for you, fix it. If you care enough, you'll find a way. If you don't you'll make stupid excuses that have nothing to do with how lazy you really are. Example: nursing school is $48K (at least the one I want to attend). I live paycheck to paycheck and literally don't have anything leftover after bills/rent/debt to even have a savings! As embarrassing as that sounds, I'm not ashamed to admit that I struggle often because it makes me appreciate the little things more. It also makes me work twice as hard because I don't want to live like this forever. How am I going to pay for nursing school with poor credit? I have some options I'm playing with, but regardless I'm will be able to afford it - one way or another. Just pray for me (lol). 

Bottom line: if you hate your life now, quitting will make you hate it even more. Find out what it is you want to do, take some time to think about it and then make a plan. Practice makes perfect so keep adjusting your plan until you reach your end goal. Oh and there's no time limit or age where you're supposed to know what the fuck you want to do. If you don't know it now, you will eventually. Don't sweat it. Just try out the things that do interest you and see how far it takes you. Whatever you do, don't settle.

I'm almost 30 - well 3 years shy of it and I just figured out that I want to pursue nursing. I was even against the medical fields for years (I didn't want to be that Asian kid). Yet after trying everything else that I thought I wanted to do, I learned that none of these careers are fulfilling or rewarding enough for me. The feeling of helping a woman through such a life-changing period and being there to support her is a feeling you cannot buy and cannot get any where else. Just send your pregnant selves over to me in a few years and I'll take good care of you!

Oh and by the way, you will have to sacrifice. Working full-time and going to school while blogging and shooting means lack of sleep, a moody Lisa, less socializing and going MIA from time to time. BUT the payoff is going to be amazing and you must never forget why you started in the first place.